It's been a while since I've blogged but I need an outlet to write some of my thoughts where my characters are not limited. So many things have changed since last I've blogged. First and foremost is my spiritual life. The change in my spiritual life has created a domino effect of change in other parts of my life. My health has changed,and not for the better. My social life has changed I have become a homebody/hermit/agoraphobic. My thinking has changed because of my spiritual life and my cognition and conversation has changed as well.
This is the worst part of the change and the main reason as to why I stopped, writing and blogging.
Here, I will explain the changes,what they have cost me, how it effects friends and family that I love.
My daily struggles with my health and the faith that keeps me holding on.
My health should be interesting to read about, seeing that it is a combination of goodies (sarcasm).
I have achalasia, Diabetes, B12 deficiency, high blood pressure, and other stuff I do not wish to share,that's right there is even more symptoms, illnesses and diseases that I have to deal with. I am also being aggressively tested for multiple sclerosis or whatever else is happening to my brain. I get my B12 shot every two weeks,this was changed from monthly to bi-weekly recently.
I am wary of visitors,speaking to my old friends and really panicked about writing due to the fact hat I know I am not the same person so what I say may not make sense to me and I know it but don't remember how to fix it.
I have lost friends over this and over my spiritual life. I have cancelled visits because I am embarrassed by my palsy-like gait and the way my lips tend to lean on one side and words are slurred when I get tired and I tire very easily. It looks like I am having a stroke. My voice stops working mid-sentence at times,which is very awkward.
So, I ask, dear reader, to keep these things in mind when I don't make sense and if you are still interested in reading this, well then I'm impressed.
